It has been a very eventful week, or rather a week and 2 days to be exact. It all started on Thursday the 26th July. At the office we were all preparing for our one and only annual business trip, at least a 3 days 2 nights trip to Vietnam, only to Hanoi this year since the partner’s office in Ho Chi Minh City has been moved to … Jalan Ampang!!! Yeah, the PETRONAS Carigali Vietnam JV Dept was moved to their KLCC office. What a bummer! So we had to settle for Hanoi only. Preparing for the trip means, you know the mandatory presentation slides, the backup answers for some pre-empted queries by both the Malaysian and the Vietnam partners ladida ladidee… In the car to work on Thursday morning I felt rather achy all over and I thought I had a temperature. At first I thought it was because of my workout at the gym, but remembering that the last time I was at the gym was on Tuesday, the muscle aches cannot be 2 days later. I suspect that I was coming down with something. A quick visit to the Dr at noon confirmed that I was already burning up, 38oC. So, I took the half day off hoping to sleep off the fever that afternoon so that I could come back fresh the next day to copy the presentation materials that the others are still working on into the laptop that I had to take along to Hanoi on Monday. Our flight was supposed to be at 10 am Monday, so there is just no time to stop by the office that Morning, everything has got to be done by Friday.
When I woke up Friday morning, feeling rather normal, as in I was no longer shivering when I came in contact with water, so I thought I was fine. Off to work I went, also found out the evening before that I was supposed to prepare some additional back up slides, so got to get myself to the office then, no excuse.
Half way through the day, I found myself feeling lousy again, my fever is back. I quickly printed all the presentation materials, copied all the soft copies and then I pleaded with my husband to fetch me home early. At 4, my husband rang to say that he’s 5 minutes away. So, nervously I approached my boss to get his permission to scoot off early saying that I’m still not feeling too good. He was like, “are you going to be well enough for the trip on Monday?”. I’m like, yeah, well I going home straight to “recuperate”, should be able to make it.
Hah!, Little did I know, that I was flat on my back that evening, the whole of Saturday and guess what I was burning up to even 39-40 oC on Sunday!!! I really thought I wouldn’t be able to make it for my trip. I thank god that I have somewhat prepared with my packing list earlier in the week, and have bought all that I needed to buy for the trip, including bubble wraps, tapes and strings (this is another story altogether) and I have also changed my shopping money. Very important, this!
On Sunday, when I felt a little stronger after taking my last 2 Uphamol, I hurriedly packed my stuff, just incase I wake up on Monday bright and breezy and ok to go. However, once the aspirin began to wear off, I started feeling sick again and when I checked my temperature, I was burning up again. Since I am out of aspirins, we went to Ampang Puteri Specialist Hospital also intending to do dengue test since my temperature was yoyo-ing up and down, but I’ve learnt my lesson, so I called my Insurance Company way ahead to ensure that they send in my Guarantee letter early.
Well, actually, besides the fever, I am also late. As in my monthly friend was 4 days late that Sunday. I am never late, always on time or early. So, besides going through a dengue blood test, I also had them do a urine test. Waited for about an hour in the emergency room, they gave me 2 panadols to reduce my temperature when I came in. Finally, they called us back in for the results. First and foremost, the Dr said I don’t have dengue, my platlet was pretty high at 300. So good, my urine test though showed that I may have some kind of a Vaginal Infection, and the Pregnancy Test showed that I am +ve!!! Alhamdulillah!!! I’m finally pregnant! Nayli was with us, she was estatic. I don’t know what did it, whether it was the panadol, or the –ve results for the dengue test or just the fact that I am +vely pregnant. But when I left the hospital, I felt so much better. So I knew then that I’m fine and I’m going to Hanoi. As long as I took my aspirins at the prescribed times. I even set the alarm at 12 that night to pop more panadols. Crazy.
Woke up at 6, pop more panadols, every six hours, truly I was just following the prescription. I made sure that I was dressed for the cool temperature in the aircraft. To hell about dressing up to go into Business Class, I was in my oldest oldest jeans, and my Polo Shirt, threw in my trench-coat, yes you read it right, the only smart looking jacket in my closet, if it wasn’t my thin trenchies I would have to resort to either a few layers of pashima, (the colours would just clash) or my sweat shirt from University Days. So the trench coat it is. Boy was I glad I had it, cause it was cold in the plane, plus my not so well self. Luckily I’m all warm and drugged!!!
There were 4 of us from TML, myself, Izam, Maisura and our boss Razzi. Maisura is the new addition to this trip. Last year it was with Norlina since Maisura was not directly involved in WPB. Since this year Norlina is aready heavily pregnant, and Maisura has been taking over Norlina’s WPB portfolio, she gets to go to the Review. We were joined by 4 other gentlemen from PETRONAS Carigali. Everyone carries one super compact carry on luggage with the wheels and handle that everyone seems to carry these days. With the exception of me and Izam who had checked in a huge bag each containing at least one other empty bag. We had plans, obviously.
The plane was about 40 minutes late leaving KLIA, so we finally reach Hanoi at about 2ish local time, 1 hour earlier than Malaysian time. We got settled in our Hotel, Hilton Hanoi Opera, we got the Executive Floor this time. Thank goodness we were not given the huge 3 bedded rooms like last year. Unpack, did our Jamak prayers and we had some tea at the Executive Lounge before setting off to Hang Gai and Hang Trong to begin our shopping expedition!!! I was tired I guess from the flight etc etc so my “shopping speed” was not my normal. I also vowed to myself to stick to the budget and not touch my credit card at all. So the slow motion action was good. I also planned to stick to my shopping list. Some silk tablecloths for myself and mom, some cotton ones for mom only, some lacquerware for me and mom-in law and me and me and me. For the first night in Hanoi, we finished at about 7 Hanoi time, and we thought, yeah we’ve had enough for tonight, let’s go back to the Hotel and get something to eat. We settled for the Hotel Restaurant, Chez Manon. We had the works, soup for appetizers and I had grilled seabass for the main course. I guess I was so tired that I couldn’t finish the fish, plus the thick creamy wild mushroom spoilt my appetite a little. In spite of recovering from a bad fever the day before, I was pretty ok, that night. Didn’t bother to unpack my shopping, just straight away prepare my things for the meeting next day, had a quick hot bath, prayed and jumped into bed, drugged again of course. I slept well that night. No problem.
I woke up fresh and early the next morning. My fever is gone, felt so much better. This meeting normally in previous years usually lasted for about 2-2 ½ hrs the most, but this year since we are calling it a workshop, and we invited the Carigali group from Malaysia to join the PVEP group in Hanoi, we had to prepare a presentation and discussion materials that would at least last till 3 p.m. However, miracles do happen. We managed to breeze through the slides and answer all partners queries by 1p.m. Lunch was provided courtesy of PVEP. They generously took up our suggestion to cater from the only HALAL restaurant that we know exist in Hanoi, Nissa Restaurant.
We were back at the Hotel by 3. After freshening up and changing into our shopping attire we were off to Dong Xuan Market, the wholesale market in Hanoi to continue with the rest of the unchecked items in our shopping list. I needed to get some bags for Pat and perhaps a cute sunhat for Nayli and some Pistachios to take home. When we were done with the market, we headed for Hang Gai and Hang Trong again, in case you are wondering, these two are the main shopping avenues in Hanoi to visit in the Old Quarters. If you check out the shops one by one diligently, there are a lot of things that you can get, and most of these shops dangerously accept the plastic money too!!! Again, we only stopped when it was dark and when we are so tired and hungry plus each one of us had a huge knock off Kipling body bag sized about 1mtr X 0.5mtr each filled with our purchases that evening. At first we were going to the HALAL Restaurant, then I remembered that it was our last night there, and we still haven’t tried the Lobster that Maisura was talking about in Sofitel Metropole. We actually stopped the taxi driver mid-way to Nissa and changed route to Sofitel Metropole. Gosh, aren’t we glad we did so. The lobster was fabulous. Yum! Yum! Yum! And on company’s expense, why not???
Day 3 in Hanoi – Our flight back to KL is at 14:40, so check in would be 2 hours earlier, that’s about 12. So we have about 2-3 hours still depending on what time we start in the morning. Though all our bags are packed that night, we thought, yeah why not, let’s have a final go of the Hanoi Streets one last time. We headed to Dong Xuan market again cause, Izam wanted to get some more materials and I thought I’d find a knock off Kipling Backpack to match the Black Kipling Huge “Body Bag” I bought the day before. Then we hailed a taxi to take us to Hang Gai again! We only managed to do only 4 shops but I got my table lamp that I have eyes on since last year, just a fraction smaller in size then the ones in the Hilton lobby for just a song!!! To be hand carried home of course. I also got a lovely authentic bangle from this quaint little boutique, where Mai and Izam got some nice tops and lovely satin dresses. Izam and I also got some cute traditional looking slippers for Eisha and Nayli. We did well in a 2 hour time frame. We quickly rushed home to stuff these new purchases in our bags, I had to also wrap my table lamp, order lunch in the room, have a quick shower and prepare for checkout within like 40 minutes!! We made it in good time. Then off to the airport and bye-bye Hanoi! Until next year!!!
That was Wednesday night, reach the airport at about 7p.m. Took the ERL to KL Sentral and Jack fetched me with the kids. We stopped by my mother in-law’s how’s for dinner and for me to pass to her one of the 2 souvenirs that I got for her. I was very excited about giving to her immediately. I’m like that. Anyhow only reached home at about 10:30p.m. Jack was leaving for Hanoi, no kidding the next morning on Air Asia flight at about 6 in the morning. So that night, I just met him briefly. Went to work as usual the next day and Friday. Thought I’d skipped my Yoga that Thurday evening, since I’m already pregnant and was adviced by my Yoga instructor to not continue with classes should I get pregnant. I also changed my mind about going to the Gym on Friday, since I just recovered from a bad fever I thought, I’d start exercising again next week. That afternoon for lunch, we went to The Manhattan Fish Market in Ampang Park, Izam, Zakiah and I. After lunch we went separate ways, and I ended up buying 2 “I could wear this even when I am pregnant” tops from this shop, one of which I have been eyeing a few times. Reached home, felt normal, not too tired. Read to the kids, put them to bed, somehow they slept early cause Nayli had a slight fever. Zarif fell asleep while I was in the bathroom preparing for bed.
That morning at about 2 :30 , I woke to Zarif’s call asking for milk. This is pretty normal most nights. After he finished his milk, and I made sure that he has gone back to sleep, I went to the loo. I never bothered to switch on the lights when I use the bathroom at night, cause I had my bedside lamp on, so I could pretty much see in the semi-darkness. While peeing I noticed some stains on my panties (pardon the details, here, though I need to to get facts exactly how it was). I thought ok, what is this. I immediately called my husband in Hanoi. Thank god her heard his phone rang inspite of the late or rather the early hours. As usual, Mr. Cool, (or rather later on he confessed to me that he thought, the call was a dream!) ok,relax, maybe it’s nothing. OK, though I wept a little, I said I’ll wait till morning and will go see Dr. Ashar, my Gynae in the morning since I remembered they open half day on Saturdays. We said our goodbyes and I tried to go back to sleep. Somehow I couldn’t, I got up again and went to the bathroom again. This time, I did switch on the lights, I took a cotton pad and swab my private area and to my horror, there was a thick blood clot on the cotton pad. I just screamed in horror and immediately knew this is no regular spotting. Tried calling hubby again but he didn’t answer the phone. Next I called my mom. My father answered the phone, of course hearing his and my mother’s concerned voiced, I just crumbled and started wailing. I’m bleeding, I’m bleeding what am I going to do??? My mother said go to the hospital now, don’t wait any longer. When we got off the phone, my mind just went into packing mode, cause I am so sure I am going to be admitted. Did frantic packing, kissed my sleeping babies called my maid and by that time, my father has arrived to rush me to Ampang Puteri Hospital A&E yet again, for the 2nd time in a week, I’m in that place again only for a different reason. The MO (medical officer) deduced that I should just be admitted and wait for the next day when all the clinics are open and my gynae can take a look at me.
I came in at 3:30 am on Saturday but only managed to see my Dr at 12 noon!!! He did the whole works, scanned from the outside and from the insides. The whole time, I wasn’t in pain, but I bled the whole time. And the saddest part was that he couldn’t find the sack in my uterus, just no sign of a pregnancy. The funny thing though is that my urine test that Saturday morning still showed that I’m pregnant. There are only 2 possibilities he said; either I it was an abortion, that would explain the blood clot and the bleeding and it would be a clean one, since it is still at the early stage on conception, or if it is still there it would be an ectopic pregnancy. Whatever the case, they need to do an ECG, some kind of a hormone test by taking and testing my blood sample. I was devastated anyhow. The nurse then wheeled me back to my room. I cannot remember who I was messaging immediately perhaps Jack, but I was in tears when the nurse came in again to check on me. I lost my baby! How could I have lost it??? Was it because of my high fever? My trip to Hanoi, even though my body has not fully recovered from the fever? Am I at fault? What were the signs that I have ignored. Should I have known??? This is my third pregnancy, did I just took things for granted that everything was going to be ok, just because my first two pregnant went well?? What?
Should I be relieved? That if the pregnancy were to go on, that the baby may be unhealthy? Is it nature’s way of rejecting the production of a foetus that would have been unhealthy anyway. Guess, I’d never know. I supposed I should thank god, which I do, inspite of everything that I am fine, I feel fine physically inspite of feeling the loss. My health is not in danger as of now. It is Sunday today, 5th August, the Dr. just came in this afternoon to say that they were unable to process my blood sample being a weekend and all, and they still have not ruled out an Ectopic Pregnancy, I’m still pregnant, they may need to operate on me to find that source of bleeding and to really clean the foetus (or whatever you call “my supposedly 3rd miracle”) at this stage.
It’s a funny feeling what I am going through now. This is just 4 – 5 weeks into pregnancy and I do have 2 beautiful children already. I imagined, it must be harder for 1st time will be mothers to loose their pregnancy and furthermore at a later stage of pregnancy. Only now, I know how it feels. For those who have never gone through this, you have no idea how it feels. So do not say, “I how how it feels” to some one who has just gone through this. The feeling is like no other. It’s not like you loose your diamond ring, or your maid burnt a whole in your favourite shirt and made it unwearable anymore. The feeling is just emptiness. You knew you had a growing being in you and one day you wake up and it is out of your system, just flushed out into the bowl. If I still am having this baby, the due date would be in the first week of April. I figured, since Nayli was born 2 weeks earlier and Zarif 3, I was almost certain, this baby would have been born sometime in late March making it a month after Zarif’s birthday. I was already planning to have a combined 1st birthday party with Zarif in 2009. I knew perhaps I jinxed if for planning too soon. That’s why the Malays believed in keeping mum for a while about a pregnancy and not to plan too far ahead, especially not a 1st birthday party at the 1st month of pregnancy. Now I know.
I do accept it now. It’s just not meant to be. It isn’t time yet. It’s not the right moment. Allah is great! He giveth and he taketh whenever he deems right. I should not argue or even question. It is just not right for me to do so. So, I resign to accept his test dutifully. This is fate and I embrace it.
waiting will not be anything like in APSH. So, I chose the only lady Gynae available, set an appointment and went. I must say I made the right move. My appointment was at 10:30a.m. I left the office at 9:45a.m caught a cab and was there at almost 10:00. Probably earlier, didn't notice the time. I was greeted by the concierge staff, well he didn't exactly bow and put his hand that way as in the photo, but close enough, he opened my cab door, and when I asked him whether I would have a problem getting another one after my appointment, he graciously answered my question. 1 point there, [Well, okay APSH has this service too]. Once 
I entered the lobby, fuwaaaa very nice! Just like entering a hotel, not a budget one at that. I was directed to the 6th floor, the WCC (Women and Children Centre) for registration and all. After filling up the necessary form, I was directed to a waiting room, that is almost empty, except for two waiting couples. I haven't even finished the usual 10-12 pages of heavy advertisement of the PRESTIGE, when I was already called for the usual Bp, Weighing (this was when I found out that they have a lousy weighing scale, totally useless) and Height check. Glad that they didn't have a waistline check, I would have walked out right there and then. Ha!ha!ha! As if! Anyhow, after all this, I was asked to wait again, so back to the waiting room. Picked up the PRESTIGE again, since only in hospitals and clinics,do I get to read these things since I don't go beyond Harper's Bazaar in my choices of magazines indulgence. Tatler and Prestige? Puhlees, let's get real. So, I finished browsing through PRESTIGE and on to my book that I brought. I didn't get to read much before I was called to go in the Dr's Suite. Time check - that is less than a total of 30 minutes ok??? Mama mia! I like this hospital already. Now, the Dr. I LVoe the Dr., and not just because she said I didn't look my age!!! Ha!ha!ha! She's nice, friendly, gentle, funny and super cute. What is there not to like? Now I am considering to have another child, just because I like her! Notttttttt!!! I was out of her office by 10:40. Shortly after I was already waiting outside the hospital looking at this view while waiting for the cab to arrive.
waiting will not be anything like in APSH. So, I chose the only lady Gynae available, set an appointment and went. I must say I made the right move. My appointment was at 10:30a.m. I left the office at 9:45a.m caught a cab and was there at almost 10:00. Probably earlier, didn't notice the time. I was greeted by the concierge staff, well he didn't exactly bow and put his hand that way as in the photo, but close enough, he opened my cab door, and when I asked him whether I would have a problem getting another one after my appointment, he graciously answered my question. 1 point there, [Well, okay APSH has this service too]. Once 
I entered the lobby, fuwaaaa very nice! Just like entering a hotel, not a budget one at that. I was directed to the 6th floor, the WCC (Women and Children Centre) for registration and all. After filling up the necessary form, I was directed to a waiting room, that is almost empty, except for two waiting couples. I haven't even finished the usual 10-12 pages of heavy advertisement of the PRESTIGE, when I was already called for the usual Bp, Weighing (this was when I found out that they have a lousy weighing scale, totally useless) and Height check. Glad that they didn't have a waistline check, I would have walked out right there and then. Ha!ha!ha! As if! Anyhow, after all this, I was asked to wait again, so back to the waiting room. Picked up the PRESTIGE again, since only in hospitals and clinics,do I get to read these things since I don't go beyond Harper's Bazaar in my choices of magazines indulgence. Tatler and Prestige? Puhlees, let's get real. So, I finished browsing through PRESTIGE and on to my book that I brought. I didn't get to read much before I was called to go in the Dr's Suite. Time check - that is less than a total of 30 minutes ok??? Mama mia! I like this hospital already. Now, the Dr. I LVoe the Dr., and not just because she said I didn't look my age!!! Ha!ha!ha! She's nice, friendly, gentle, funny and super cute. What is there not to like? Now I am considering to have another child, just because I like her! Notttttttt!!! I was out of her office by 10:40. Shortly after I was already waiting outside the hospital looking at this view while waiting for the cab to arrive.
Not a bad view huh?
Edamame.
California Rolls.
Agedashi Tofu.
Agedashi Tofu - one piece person, not the whole bowl.
Ebi Tenpura Maki - one piece per person too! 
Seafood Teppanyaki Set
Seafood close up - the scallops hmm yumm!
Tokyo Bento.
Beef Teppanyaki.
Gindara Teriyaki - Grilled cod fish with Teriyaki Salt. I chose this based on Pat's suggestion, and 5 others followed suit.
Sushi Bento.
Salmon Teppanyaki Set - our boss's choice.
Group Photo - Our Lady Boss in Ocean Green Baju Kurung on the right, way up front.
For dessert, the orders came up to only 2 types somehow. 
I had this Tempura Ice Cream which is Deep Fried Vanilla Ice Cream which I think tasted 
I had this Tempura Ice Cream which is Deep Fried Vanilla Ice Cream which I think tasted 
The best part of today is that everything went very smoothly and to top it off, the same day delivery really allow my “glow” after the theraphy to continue further till the end of the day, that’s when we spring cleaned, not the whole apartment, but basically the very corners that the new furnitures are going to. It’s like you went shopping for clothes and shoes then come home to try them on. Arrrr happy happy, all the while drinking loads of warm water in between and walking around the house, like what Jack said reminded him of the movie, The Shadow, starring Alex Baldwin. I had to because I have house mite allergy, that means no dust, so no house work (He! He! Lucky me!), so the only way that I can do house work, should I REALLY REALLY NEED TO, is to cover my nose and mouth. Since we were frantically tidying up the house, kids all excited from a whole day out, Jack decided to relief me from cooking dinner, thank goodness, I am sooo blessed today! We had dinner at our favourite Kelantanese food stall nearby our place, even fetched my mother-in-law to join us for dinner. Ahhh this has turned out to be a good day for me. Thank God! Almost forgot the A&E incident, ALMOST!!!